Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Billy (The Movie Buff)

This particular episode was one of those sneaky dates. You know the ones I mean... when you don't realize until you've already agreed to go that it's meant to be a date?

So I ended up after some confusion with an obligation to meet (meeting him there was my idea) him for some frozen yogurt. Just dessert, right?! No biggie.

At first it was fine. Small talk, big bites. Once the conversation had reached a serious lull, he began asking me if I had seen certain movies. If I hadn't seen it, he would go into a long reenactment of all the "funniest" parts. After a few of those, I decided to try saying that I had seen it! Incorrect.

If I had seen it, the same sort of reenactment would follow... only this time it would require my participation. A few times I tried changing the subject, but at the first pause, the conversation would return to one of the previously-discussed movies with a, "Yeah and remember that one part..."

After over an hour of this, I remembered some errands I was planning to run after the outing and mentioned that I needed to get to the store before it closed.
*Side note: This was legitimate. I did not make this up just as an excuse, although it was convenient.

The store happened to be across the parking lot from where we were, so like a gentleman he insisted on doing my shopping with me. Escape failure. As I grabbed my necessities (minus a few that I wasn't going to shop for with him) the subject changed to my favorite sports teams and the reasons they all suck. Honestly? I would rather listen to bad Will Ferrell impressions.

A painful 45 minutes later I was standing by my car with the door open, keys in hand. After thanking him for dessert, saying goodnight, and offering a quick hug... I began to get into my car. Just as I was about to close the door, he began a whole new discussion of all of his favorite Adam Sandler movies. I amused him for another 10 minutes before saying goodnight one final time. I'm fairly certain he was still describing a car chase scene from "The Longest Yard" as I drove away.

Bless his heart.