Saturday, January 23, 2010

Mick (The Recycler)

A little over two years ago, my college apartment was assigned a new apartment of boys for our FHE family. Two of my roommates and I went over Sunday evening to chat before we had FHE the next night. After FHE Monday night, one of my "brothers" pulled me aside and said, "Hey, I just feel like I need to let you know that I have a girlfriend." (sidenote: I don't think I gave him any reason to need to have this conversation.) He went on to explain that he still wanted to hang out with me...I should just keep in mind he has a girlfriend. I let him know I was completely okay with the fact that he was taken.

Long story short: He went to run errands a few days later with my roommate and myself and we were in the children's story section of Deseret Book when he sits me down to have another "talk." What he'd been dying to tell me was that he was supposed to be engaged to this girl, but since he met me (4 days ago, mind you) he'd been having second thoughts. "Do you think there's a chance between us?" It was the kind of thing that you see in the movies but never expect someone to do in real life. Very flattering. Not super tempting. Why would I want to date someone who would break an engagement for someone he doesn't know?

I later found out that I made a fabulous call on that. As it turns out, he's an underwear recycler. Apparently it can "air out" while he showers. Don't ask how I found that out.

Craig - episode two (the nap)

A few weeks after the first date, I had a break between classes in the middle of the day. Naturally this became my typical nap time. One particular afternoon, "Craig" was on his way to the door just as I was headed to my bed. My roommate told him I was upstairs napping (which was very nearly true.) They talked for a minute and the door closed. She headed to her room for a nap.

About 45 minutes later, clad in sweats and half-smeared makeup I wandered downstairs. To my surprise/dismay/...(what's a good word for creeped-outness?) he was sitting the couch watching TV. I calmly started a conversation and somehow managed not to begin with "What the heck are you doing here?" I thought I could at least be polite enough to say hello before getting ready to go back to campus.

After a painful minute or two of small talk there was a lull in the conversation. He took the opportunity to lean in close to my ear, and in a low, nasal voice that still sends shivers down my spine whisper, "You look really, really pretty today."

I've never been so excited to go to class.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Craig - episode one (Insecurity?!)

Craig was a friend of mine. He would often attempt to ask me out, but I thought it better if we remained just friends. On one occasion, Craig asked if I would be his date. You see, his roommate wanted to ask my best friend out on their first date (they're now married) and wanted him to double. I was the most logical choice.

We had a nice, relatively normal dinner before attending a musical performance at the university. Things were going just fine (or so I thought) until following one of the final numbers he leaned over and whispered in my ear, "So...I noticed that you haven't been clapping loudly as I have. Are you not enjoying yourself?"

Oh my. More from this guy later! Be excited, dear readers.