Craig - episode two (the nap)

A few weeks after the first date, I had a break between classes in the middle of the day. Naturally this became my typical nap time. One particular afternoon, "Craig" was on his way to the door just as I was headed to my bed. My roommate told him I was upstairs napping (which was very nearly true.) They talked for a minute and the door closed. She headed to her room for a nap.

About 45 minutes later, clad in sweats and half-smeared makeup I wandered downstairs. To my surprise/dismay/...(what's a good word for creeped-outness?) he was sitting the couch watching TV. I calmly started a conversation and somehow managed not to begin with "What the heck are you doing here?" I thought I could at least be polite enough to say hello before getting ready to go back to campus.

After a painful minute or two of small talk there was a lull in the conversation. He took the opportunity to lean in close to my ear, and in a low, nasal voice that still sends shivers down my spine whisper, "You look really, really pretty today."

I've never been so excited to go to class.

Craig - episode one (Insecurity?!)

Craig was a friend of mine. He would often attempt to ask me out, but I thought it better if we remained just friends. On one occasion, Craig asked if I would be his date. You see, his roommate wanted to ask my best friend out on their first date (they're now married) and wanted him to double. I was the most logical choice.

We had a nice, relatively normal dinner before attending a musical performance at the university. Things were going just fine (or so I thought) until following one of the final numbers he leaned over and whispered in my ear, "So...I noticed that you haven't been clapping loudly as I have. Are you not enjoying yourself?"

Oh my. More from this guy later! Be excited, dear readers.

Kelly (Hey, that's a guy's name, too!)

My last semester of college I was trying (and succeeding) to avoid dating altogether. One Friday night around the middle of the semester a guy I knew from church called and asked if I'd join him for a movie that evening. I was reluctant, as I had already made plans with my roommates (at least that was the excuse I used to get out of dates) but after he persisted, I consented. Five minutes later he was outside my apartment in a Jeep...with the top down. His roommate had asked another girl from my complex and and she and I were put in the back of the open Jeep while they guys sat in the front without the wind. (Did I mention it was about 45 degrees?!) After I was buckled up and we were on our way out of the parking lot, I noticed a car full of girls following behind us. "Oh yeah," he said. "Our FHE sisters wanted to come so we invited them along."

Recap: I'm freezing in the back of a Jeep with the top down and have no hair tie. I've just realized this "date" is going to be me, two guys, and seven other girls.

When we got to the movie theatre (25 minutes later) they looked at the movie times and realized the next showing wasn't for two more hours. One of the six tag-alongs suggested we all go out to eat while we wait. As magical as that sounded, I secretly texted my roommate to have her pick me up and asked them to drop me off at the mall. Even shopping didn't redeem that evening.

Larry (A Tricky Situation)

I want you all to know that I am creating this post with the utmost sensitivity. I feel the need to recount this incident based on recent suggestions for blind dates. Nobody likes blind dates, am I right!? This is my reason:

I was once set up by my roommate's boyfriend. The guy seemed nice enough when he picked me up... and as I recall we went to a movie. I thought nothing of it when he shook my left hand, or when he reached across his body (going out of his way) to open a door for me. No - It wasn't until ice cream after the movie (in the middle of a painfully dull conversation about whether or not I like to travel) that I realized that he had absolutely no use of his right arm.

First of all, I would like to point out that this was not the sole source of the awkwardness of the date, but it is something that you'd think would have been mentioned to me beforehand. Was it okay to ask about? I didn't know! So I suffered quietly through another hour and half of conversation before we went home.

Words cannot describe the discomfort caused by this blind date. Although my date was not actually blind, he was, in fact, uniplegic...and tragically boring.

Travis (Piece of Work)

This kid was a friend of one of my roommates. He and his friends came over for a dinner she had cooked for them once. A few days later, I saw him between classes on campus. As it turned out, he and I had classes in the same building, and each had an hour long break afterwards. Magical, right?! We talked for a while, he walked me to my next class, got my number, and that was it.

That weekend, he called to invite me to watch a movie at his place. It went well. He was a witty, moderately charming guy. (Red hair. I've since had to give up on redheads. More of those to come.) The very next night, he asked me out again. Once again, an enjoyable evening. He asked if he could walk me to class the next morning. He did.

Wednesday night, he had a flag football game that he had invited me to. My roommate (his friend) and I showed up... At this point I show mention we were two of about six people there, yet the guy managed NOT to make eye contact with me at all. Later that night he called my roommate to tell her that he really liked me, but was "also considering" another girl. Seriously? So we can't be civil unless we're ready to commit to a relationship. Good to know!

Didn't hear from him for a week. One Friday night, I was lying on the couch with laryngitis when there was a knock at the door. I don't typically get a lot of company at 12:30am, so naturally I was surprised. It was him...just wanting to visit. He made fun of my sad little raspy voice as we talked for a while. Finally, I needed to go to bed (as it was about 1:30 and I hadn't gotten rid of him yet) and as he was about to leave he said, "I was actually wondering if you would like to make dinner for me on Sunday."

Is this guy joking? As it turned out, he wasn't. I jokingly said something to the effect of, "I can't just go around cooking for every guy that asks." Somehow not sensing my disgust, he asked if I'd been asked recently. I said I hadn't to which he replied, "Well then, I suppose I must have been prompted to ask."

Okay. We're done. I'm still proud of what I happened next. I replied, "Luckily for you, there are about 6,000 other girls of this campus, and I'm sure plenty of them would be more than happy to fix you dinner! If I were you, I'd start with the freshman."

After staring wide-eyed for a moment, he left. :o) I don't need to tell you that we didn't spend any more time together.

Frank (The Gamer)

My junior year of college, I had been out a time or two with this guy. We had a lot in common! I actually liked him a lot... for the most part.

Our third date was your typical dinner/movie date. After dinner, he said he needed to stop by his apartment to pick something up. Upon arriving at his apartment, we found his roommates gathered around the TV played Halo. My dreamy guy decided to play "one quick game" before the show.

About an hour later, I walked myself home.

Tony (What the heck!?)

One Thanksgiving break during college, I stayed in town for the holiday. A friend of mine had a roommate who was staying for the week also, and asked if he could give him my number.

We went on what could be called a "marathon date." Under different circumstances this might have been obnoxious, but the guy wasn't half bad! In fact, he was really cute, intelligent, and we had a lot in common. We were supposed to meet a group of volunteers at a nursing home, but showed up at the wrong one. Luckily, the one we went to also had elderly people we could talk to. After visiting for a while, we had pie and played "Pictionary" on campus. I figured we'd call it a night, but after learning that I loved playing catch, he suggested we grab a football and head to the field. As we played, a light snow began to fall. Magical, right?

After a few good tosses and some satisfactory conversation, he dropped me off at my apartment, asking if I'd like to do something again. I didn't think much about it until a little over a week later.

I mustered up some confidence and just before one of my night classes, sent him a friendly message inviting him to a gathering my roommates and I were having that weekend. No big deal, right? I sat through class and upon getting out of class, I saw that he had called and left a message. The message said only this:

"Um... I don't have text messaging in my phone plan so please don't text me."

Seriously? At least I know it's not because I throw like a girl...